humor

Guest Blogger: Squeaks Takes Over!

Half the title is true!

I’m taking over this blog . . . at least for the meantime. Anitamom has too many eggs in her nest to write. There’s the “promoting OPERATION HOPPER” egg and the “filming a commercial for the Fall Sale” egg and “learning how to create a website” egg. (She’s watched more YouTube videos about websites than there are seeds on my sprig of millet.)

Yummmmm! I love millet. THINKING about millet gives me the coos. I can’t stop cooing when Anitamom plops a sprig in my seed dish. That’s usually on Mondays.

So I reread what I dictated so far and I’m not sticking to the flight plan! I’m flipping around like a yellow warbler hunting gnats! I forgot to introduce myself. 

I’m Squeaks. Anitamom’s rescue cockatiel. She rescued me more than eight seasons ago. That’s more seasons than I have toes. (I’m better at writing than I am counting.) If you don’t know what a cockatiel is, I’ll fill you in. I’m a parrot- bigger than a parakeet and smaller than an African Grey.

Anitamom thought I was a cedar waxwing. I’m more handsome and smarter than a songbird!

What I’m NOT is a cedar waxwing. That’s what Anitamom thought I was when we first met. She thought I was a cedar waxwing perched at the bottom of a shrub.  Anitamom is curious. She knew waxwings like the top of trees not the bottom of bushes. She came closer to investigate.

It reminded me of a prowl. I’m a cockatiel. Escaping a prowler is at the top of my “to do” list or I’ll be “done for.” Escaping isn’t easy for me. I can’t fly. Something happened to my wings and all I can do is flop forward. My wings don’t hurt, but they don’t work right. All I can do is flopfly in little leaps. 

I flopflew in circles and Anitamom walkstopped in circles. I was getting dizzy. Finally, she used that logical mind of hers. She threw something and it went dark like the sun fell out of the sky and the moon didn’t show up. I found out later she flung her jacket over me and scooped me up. 

We walked home. Well, Anitamom did all the walking. I shrieked in the dark hoping to scare her away. Good thing Anitamom doesn’t scare easily. I was a sitting duck in that bush. A terror bird (humans call them hawks) might have had me for lunch. That’s the way my wild world works. I pick off the millet seeds and a hawk would pick me off.

Anitamom rescued me.

Now I’m rescuing her. She doesn’t have time to write her blog now. She’s hatching too many eggs. I don’t want her “A Few Choice Words by Anita blog egg” to not fly.

So like I said. Half the title is true. I’m taking over, but I’m NOT a guest. A guest is invited. Anitamom didn’t invite me to write for her. I invited myself. She doesn’t know anything about it. So DON’T tell her.

She rescued me. Now I’m rescuing her.

Check out Anitamom’s books on her Amazon Author website. They’re really good stories about nature and animals and pets. I listened when she read them out loud. http://amazon.com/author/anitaborgo

11 thoughts on “Guest Blogger: Squeaks Takes Over!”

    1. Dear DeSantaclaushuman, That means I’m a good boy and I’ll get lots of millet when you come down my chimney. Wait! It’s DeSantis. Not Santaclaushuman! That’s ok. I’m still a good boy and I’ll get lots of millet and NO ping pong balls! I HATE ping pong balls. Thanks, Mr. Squeakers.

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    1. Dear humangarlandering reader, My Anitamom CAN be SO lazy. Sometimes she slurpies her coffee BEFORE she takes the cover off MY cage. I hate that worse than ping pong balls. Your bird in the hand, Squeaky Pie (Sometimes Anitamom calls me that. Then I like her better than millet!)

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  1. Yes, I am clever! You are more watchful than a terror bird, Karenhumanpatty! I’m more smarter than any cedar waxwing. . . and I’m a good boy. I know because Momanita tells me when she gives me the grainy round Cheerios on Thursdays. I like millet more better.

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  2. Good post, Squeaks! I had one of those too many eggs in the air days when u first posted this, so just read it today. If you had known what a good mom Anita was you would’ve rang her doorbell & invited yourself in right away when u got lost.

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    1. Dear Paulalalahumanperson, Momanita is a gooder mom than ever! She shared her grammy crackers! I like grammy cracker day! I don’t like trimthenails day. Trimthenails day is gooder than pingpongo bouncy balls. I hate pingpongo bouncy balls. Goody bye, Squeaky Beak (Momanita calls me that when my whistles sing too loud.)

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