Cooking, humor

Save The Word! And This Isn’t Brabble!

I save leftovers. (Meatloaf sandwich, anyone?)

I save the elephants. (Ornaments from World Wildlife Fund, Merry Christmas, Jack and Leila!) 

I save time. (Pack the perishables in one bag and cans in the second. I’ll carry the toilet paper under one arm and loop my finger through the milk gallon jug. Receipt? Tuck that in my pocket. Then I don’t need to come back to return the shopping cart.)

Now it’s time to save a word!

According to several words will be removed from the dictionary due to lack of use. The lexicon assassins, Collins Dictionary researchers, targeted the following: aerodome (an aircraft landing area), alienism (study of mental illness), and char-a-bane (a sightseeing bus). So the topic of psychology students traveling to England for a conference and visiting Big Ben in their off time must not be heavily discussed or written about otherwise these words would be safe.

But “brabble” needs a rescue mission and I’m the SWAT (Save Words And Think) agent to do it!

Brabble means to argue stubbornly about trifles. This verb leans towards onomatopoeia in that the abrasive sound is how I feel when I’m engaged in a brabblement. 

Brabbling is universal and prehistoric. Anthropologists uncovered evidence that Cro-Magnons routinely argued about the direction toilet paper should unfurl – over or under the roll.

Although I stand firm that the person who uses the last of the toilet paper should replenish it, I’m more of a random direction toilet paper replacer.  

The most recent brabblements in which Mike and I’ve participated are food related. Our scores? Mike: 1, Me: 1, Unresolved: 1.

The Bell Pepper Fact Based Brabble: 

Over a dinner salad one of the ingredients caused a stir. I casually mentioned that although red peppers are actually ripe green peppers the other colors, yellow and orange, were separate varieties. Mike disagreed. I countered. Mike held firm. I swooped up my iPhone and smugly requested Siri for supporting facts. Instead, she took Mike’s side. Yellow and orange are stages of ripeness of the green bell pepper as well. I conceded. 

Chalk one up for Mike.

The Storage Bag Performance Based Brabble:

There’s a reason why those fold over sandwich bags are CALLED sandwich bags. Their main talent is for securing sandwiches in a somewhat protective state. A sandwich fits inside the bag without extra room thereby holding it snugly together. There’s no room for it to slide. However to ask a sandwich bag to encase a wedge of cheese or half a raw onion or anything that is NOT a sandwich, is asking it to perform outside its skill set. 

One evening while cleaning up after dinner, I pointed out to Mike that a storage bag would be a better choice for storing the half sweet potato than a sandwich bag. He said I was wrong. In his opinion his versatile sandwich bag would get the job done.  I countered that the undependable sandwich bag fell short of the task. To prove me wrong he popped the potato into the bag and folded the bag over to close. The potato escaped and rolled across the floor. 

Score one for Anita.

The Sell By, Best If Used Before, Pack, Guaranteed Fresh Date Brabble:

This brabble raises its thorny head whenever I clean the refrigerator.  I know the dates stamped on jars and bottles and packages indicate quality or freshness or peak flavor not necessarily safety. However, if these containers have been opened in the frig for a number of weeks I feel it my duty as refrigerator cleaner to toss them. 

Mike disagrees. He contends that if it’s not furry and passes the sniff test, it’s still edible. Considering the ham incident, I question whether he would EVER throw food items away. A ham from a decade of Easters ago nestled in the bottom of his freezer. Before transporting his freezer to my home when he moved in, he baked the twenty-pounder. I wouldn’t touch it. Mike ate a ham dinner and suffered no consequences. The leftovers? He FROZE them! There comes a time when you need to just give it up!

We’ve brabbled this topic numerous times with no compromise. Now when I notice a product has lingered in the frig a bit too long for my liking, I purchase a new one. Then I replace the old item with the new one before I throw it away. He’s never the wiser, unless he’s reading this post.

Rate this one Unresolved.

Be a SWAT agent and rescue “brabble.” Use “brabble,” “brabblement,” even “brabbler” in your conversations and writing. That’s the only way to save the word. Do your part and start now! Share your “brabblements” below in a comment!

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